


Grit Your Teeth, Pull Your Hair, Paint The Walls Black And Scream 'Fuck The World'.

by RahRaZorBlade



Series: Truth Be Told I Never Was Yours [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Crying, Cutting, Eating Disorders, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Other, Protective Team, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suga is team mum, Sugamama, Swearing, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-02
Updated: 2016-05-02
Packaged: 2018-06-05 20:46:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,093
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6722746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RahRaZorBlade/pseuds/RahRaZorBlade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone notices there's something wrong with Hinata. And all Hinata can thing about is how he's disappointed everyone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Grit Your Teeth, Pull Your Hair, Paint The Walls Black And Scream 'Fuck The World'.

**Author's Note:**

> I had a black out and due to being extremely bored and having 'Missing You' by All Time Low on repeat... THIS is the outcome!

_I heard that you've been_  
_Self-medicating in the quiet of your room,_  
_Your sweet, suburban tomb._  
_And if you need a friend,_  
_I'll help you stitch up your wounds._

"What's that on your sleeve." Tadashi asked him.

Hinata frowned, his heart rate sky-rocketed.

"I-I-it's left overs from lunch. I should probably clean it when I get home." He forced a smile and a laugh.

Tadashi nodded, not convinced.  
"If you say so." He frowned, walking away.

That's one more cut, for being careless.

* * *

  
_I heard that you've been_  
_Having some trouble finding your place in the world._  
_I know how much that hurts,_  
_But if you need a friend_  
_Then please just say the word..._

"You need to pull your head in, Idiot. If you miss one more, I'm coming over there." Kageyama glared at the smaller boy.

Hinata gulped and nodded.  
"Sorry, I'll get it this time!" He took a shaky breath.

He hit it.

"Finally! Took you all fucking afternoon!" He growled.

"Let's go home. We'll practise again tomorrow. And I SWEAR you better hit every one of them." He huffed.

The orange haired boy nodded.  
"I will! I promise."

Kageyama rolled his eyes and walked away.  
"What ever. See you tomorrow."

'That's one for every ball I missed.' Hinata thought to himself. Adding the forty-second tally to the piece of paper.

It was going to be a long night.

* * *

  
_You've come this far,_  
You're all cleaned up,  
You've made a mess again,  
There's no more trying,  
Time to sort yourself out...

He stood in the school hallway, looking out of the large open window, deep in thought.

"Hey, Hinata!" He was pounce on by an over enthusiastic pint-sized human.

Nishinoya smiled wickedly while Asahi stood back and gave a small smile and wave.

"Noya, Asahi, what are you doing here?" The younger boy forced a smile.

Noya's smile dropped to a frowned.  
"We just saw you standing here and were wondering while you're not eating lunch."

Hinata looked around him, noticing that he was still at school.

He blushed and shook his head.  
"Oh right. I've uh- I've already eaten. I was just gonna go outside. I'll see you at practise.

He ran off, wondering how many it would take to get rid of the guilt he felt for making his upperclassmen and teammates worry.

* * *

  
_Hold on tight,_  
This ride is a wild one,  
Make no mistake,  
The day will come when you can't cover up what you've done,  
Now don't lose your fight, kid,  
It only takes a little push to pull on through,  
With so much left to do;  
You'll be missing out, and we'll be missing you.

It was like Tsukishima knew. He kept staring at the younger boy.

Hinata tried to ignore the feeling of eyes burning into him.

It made him rub nervously at his wrists and arms.

Everything felt itchy and irritated.

But the eyes never left him, almost felt like he was going to disappear if Tsukishima looked away.

If Hinata didn't know better, he would have thought the tall male cared. But he knew better than that.

That's a few more for assuming people care about him.

* * *

 

 _I heard that you've been_  
Having some trouble finding your place in the world.  
I know how much that hurts,  
And if you need a friend  
Then please just say the word...

Was Suga hovering around him more often, or was he just being paranoid?

...Nope he wasn't exaggerating. Suga was tightly pressed to his side while they sat down on the gym floor.

Suga gave him sweet smiles. A hint of worry in his eyes, with a 'motherly' look.

"Everything alright, Shou?" Suga asked.

Hinata chocked on his water, not expecting anyone to ask him that.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

Suga shrugged.  
"Just asking."

Hinata nodded.  
"'M fine."

"Hurry up, get your ass over here, dumbass!" Kageyama yelled half way across the court.

Hinata yelled a quick 'coming'. He ignored Suga's motherly eyes and silent pleading.

That's seven for disappointing someone he loved dearly.

* * *

  
_Grit your teeth, pull your hair,_  
Paint the walls black and scream, "Fuck the world  
'Cause it's my life, I'm gonna take it back,"  
And never for a second blame yourself.

It was hot. A few degrees over thirty-five (Celsius).

Hinata wiped the sweat off of his forehead with the sleeve of his jumper.

"You need to take that off before you get heat stroke." Daichi said with a frown.

Hinata shook his head.  
"Can barely feel it, captain." He started to panic.

Suga scrunched his eyebrows.  
"That doesn't matter. Take it off please." His eyes begging.

Hinata looked around the court, realising everyone had stopped playing and were staring at him.

His chest tightened.  
"Wha-what's going on?" He asked to no one in particular.

"We need to talk." Daichi said with a frown.

"I've gotten quite a few members from the team come up to me several times this week, stating about how worried they are about you. I think it's time I take action."

Hinata's cheat tightened even more.  
"I-I-I'm fine."

"Then take off your jumper. Prove to us we're just exaggerating. Ease our worries."

Tears slipped from the younger boy's eyes, and he shook his head.  
"I-I can't."

Everyone stepped in closer.

Suga stopped in front of him. He rest his hand on the sleeve of Hinata's jumper, pausing to give the younger male an option to pull away.

He didn't.

He gulped and hung his head.

He felt his sleeve roll up, and heard gasps coming from different places around the gym.

"Oh, Shouyou!" Suga cried.

Hinata looked up and gave the team mum a week smile.  
"It's okay. I'm fine."

"That's not 'fine', idiot!" Kageyama yelled.

"It's okay, we'll help you, Shouyou. We'll all help you through this." Daichi hugged the younger boy.

Hinata wiped at his tears, snuggling into the captain's embrace.

Suga beaconed everyone else closer.

He wrapped his arms around Hinata, urging everyone to do the same.

"We'll all be here when you need us." Suga kissed his forehead.

Everyone smiled and agreed.

"Just don't do this anymore." Noya's croaky voice came behind him somewhere. He was crying too.

Hinata wanted to agree. He wanted to promise them he wouldn't do it anymore. But he couldn't.

He didn't want to make a promise if there was a chance he might break it.

But he nodded, snuggling in tighter to everyone. A small smile slipped into his face.

This felt nice, and even for a little while he could pretend everything was alright.


End file.
